Continuing the conversation with my younger self…
Current Self: Hey, I got some good news and some bad news to share with you. Which do you want first?
Younger Self: I guess the bad.
Current Self: You won’t get picked. Nobody is gonna choose you.
Younger Self: Huh? What do you mean? Chosen for what?
Current Self: Nobody is gonna walk up to you and just hand you opportunities or a job or the perfect life. Nobody will notice you. Ever.
Younger Self: I don’t think I understand.
Current Self: You know how you’re waiting for things to happen? You assume that if you do the right things — get the degree, stay within the framework, try the front door — that this will get you noticed. Someone will notice your talent and hand you the perfect job or some amazing opportunity.
Younger Self: OK, but isn’t that how The World works? Fit in, play by the rules, and get good enough to be chosen?
Current Self: That’s what I’m trying to say. It doesn’t. At least not for you.
Younger Self: That just sounds like bad news. So, what’s the good news?
Current Self: The good news is that you can choose yourself. You don’t have to wait for someone else to pick you. You can create your own opportunities, your own success, your own life.
Younger Self: That sounds selfish. I don’t want to be that guy.
Current Self: I’m not talking about narcissism. This isn’t about looking out only for yourself or caring only about yourself, or doing the things that put you ahead at all costs. In fact, it’s kind of the opposite.
Younger Self: How so?
Current Self: It’s simply about recognizing your potential, taking responsibility for your life, and using it to make a positive impact on those around you. It’s about not waiting for others to define your value or to give you permission to be great.
Younger Self: So how do I choose myself?
Current Self: Invest in yourself — physically, emotionally, intellectually, and spiritually. Embrace fear and failure. Create things. Get comfortable with uncertainty. Be open to and seek out opportunities. Talk to people — all kinds of people. Help others. Help your community. Lean into faith. Stand up for what and who you believe in, but always seek to walk in others’ shoes. Listen don’t shout. Lead with empathy.
Younger Self: Hmmm. Sounds empowering, but how am I supposed to do all that?
Current Self: That’s for you to figure out. It’s a tall order, but if you manage it, everything changes. You don’t have to be perfect. You just have to keep moving forward.
