Never use this Deadly Self-Talk Phrase Again!
This is a phrase that most of us use all the time. I, myself, have been using it since I was a toddler. It’s such a part of our normal every day conversations that we likely don’t even recognize it. Until a few months ago, I never recognized it; when i said it, when my kids said, or really when anybody said it. BUT…It’s DEADLY. What I’ve learned is that this phrase stabs our mindset right through the heart. The more we say it, the more we think it, the more holes it pokes in our heart. Our heart can only take so many holes before it just gives in.
It’s such a simple phrase…only 2 english words. Are you ready???
“I Can’t”
That’s it…Now think back on your day, and think about how many times you said or heard this? A bunch, right? Each time that phrase came out of your mouth, or whomever said it, your heart was pierced and your subconscious mind took a step back.
Successful people have learned to control their subconscious mind, because that’s where desire and the subsequent action are born. The subconscious mind knows nothing of reality and it’s trivial hurdles that it presents. The subconscious mind simply knows what it DESIRES, what CAN BE, and what it will be like when it’s ACCOMPLISHED it. Successful people never think that it can’t be done, they simply start taking action on ways to get it done.
How many times do you think people, even his own engineers, told Steve Jobs: “You can’t”, or “We can’t”? Literally 1000’s. And what was his response? Steve’s got 2 great, famous quotes that deal with this deadly phrase:
Don’t let the noise of other people’s opinions drown out your inner voice.
The one’s who think they are crazy enough to change the world, are the ones who do
Napoleon Hill’s classic Think and Grow Rich, includes a great story about Henry Ford. Mr Ford imposed a requirement on his engineering team to produce a particular type of 8-cylinder engine, because that was what his vision REQUIRED. Time and time again, his engineering team told him that they couldn’t, that it was impossible. He kept insisting and sending them back to drawing board. Guess what? It took time, eventually, they did it. He never let, “I can’t” deflect his subconscious mind from making it so.
You MUST take control of your subconscious mind, and one of the ways you do that is by controlling your self-talk. So let’s start with this simple phrase of “I Can’t”. How do we stop ourselves from saying it and ultimately banish it from our vocabulary.
- Step 1: Awareness. Tomorrow, or today if you are reading this early in the day, pay close attention to how many times you hear people say it. Pay attention to when you say. Write the number down. You may even find that you catch yourself before you say it, simply because you are aware. Make a mental note.
- Step 2: Find substitutes that are positive, but are still accurate. Now start to really be mindful of using it yourself. Start with tomorrow, be explicitly aware of NOT using the phrase. You may fumble around for words, and may even sound a bit ridiculous, but don’t say it. Say things like, “I don’t presently know how to”, or “I’m not sure I know how to yet”. Or whatever may be appropriate.
That’s it…just start there.
I love to hear your thoughts and struggles with this phrase and other deadly self-talk phrases. Comment below or connect with me and send me a message.
Have a great day!
