johnmaconline

The planet just crossed 8 billion.

I was born in 1969, so I’ve been alive for all of the billion milestones since we crossed 4 billion in 1974. In my time here, our population has doubled.

I can’t help but think about the wide range of differing views on childbearing we encounter today. Some believe that procreation is our fundamental human purpose and the ultimate gift. Others believe that having kids today is irresponsible, and how dare we. Some don’t give it much thought at all. Still, others would sacrifice anything to participate. 

With 8 billion people come 8 billion opinions. Diversity is a gift. Creative tension is inevitable. Discourse is helpful. 

To filter and make sense of those 8 billion opinions, we find our tribe and use labels. However, let’s not waste the gift of 8 billion humans by allowing the tribes to set the agenda and define the labels. 

Wherever you find yourself today, thank a fellow human. Because without the two that came before you, there would be no you.

Our youngest son recently registered his summer landscaping business as a Limited Liability Corporation. The process is simple and, dare I say, convenient — a couple of clicks, electronically pay a fee of $125 with your credit card, done. 

It took us about 20 minutes on Sunday at 7:30 am.

Then we tried to register an EIN number. Stymied. One can only submit the internet EIN application on a weekday during normal business hours.

The travesty! How inconvenient!

Isn’t the internet 24x7x365?

Life today is more convenient than it was ten years ago. Life ten years ago was more convenient than life 50 years ago. And so on.

Many of the largest companies are built around convenience.  
Whole industries exist to provide convenience. 
Some of the biggest technological advances are fundamentally about convenience.

But…

Convenience can skew perspective.
Convenience can foster entitlement.
Convenience can serve as a proxy for choice. 
Convenience can disconnect us from each other.
Convenience can disconnect us from our basic human-ness.

Convenience makes life existentially better, but let’s not forget the price.

Skilled plumbers don’t consider handy homeowners with a workshop full of tools a threat.
Skilled baristas don’t consider home espresso machines a threat.
Skilled software developers don’t consider offshoring a threat.
Skilled surgeons don’t consider machine-learning robots a threat.
Skilled artists don’t consider Fiverr a threat. 
Skilled teachers don’t consider Udemy a threat.

Technology, cheaper labor, and democratized platforms do and will continue to affect job market dynamics. 

There is, however, a path to bulletproof yourself. That path travels through “skilled.”

So what does skilled mean?

It means “good at what you do,” yes, but it also means adaptable, unique, proactive, responsible, caring, curious, current, and willing.

Are you willing to jump down out of the stands and get into the ring with the bull?

You control your level of skill. 

“Blessed are the merciful, for they will be shown mercy.”

Matthew 5:7

When you have the upper hand, you have a choice. You can show mercy or not.

If you choose not to, you may be “right,” and no one may blame you. The law may be on your side. The smart people may be on your side. The tribe may be on your side.

Choosing mercy brings risk. It exposes you to emotional danger. It might come back to bite you. It might not work.

But when have you been shown mercy? How did it make you feel? How did it work out for you?

Isn’t that a tradeoff worth making?

I received a compelling advertisement for a new internet service provider, which almost worked. But alas, it failed in step 2 because the friction was too much to overcome. 

I don’t need a new ISP, nor was I actively looking for one. But the advertisement offered more at a much better price. Eyebrow raised.

Step 1 check — advertisement compelling enough to overcome the friction of entertaining a change.

So I called the number provided. Step 2 engaged.

“I’m not interested in the $9/month equipment rental fee. I will provide my own. Can you confirm for me what I need?”

“Oh, sir, we don’t recommend that approach.”

“Is it possible?”

“Yes. You will need to do your own research.”

“OK. Now I want to confirm the details of the offer. My ad says 500 Mbps at an introductory price of $39.99 per month.”

“Hmmm…I’m showing that the cheapest offer to your address is 100 Mbps for $54.99 per month.”

“Can you tell me what is the price of 500 Mbps?”

“I show that as $44.99 per month.”

“OK, thanks for your time. We’re done here.”

Unfortunately, they never got a chance to delight (or annoy) me in step 3 — installation. I was primed and ready to change, but the friction became too much to overcome.  

If you’re trying to compel change, whether a service, habit, or belief, make sure all steps of your process focus on overcoming friction. 

I suspect some people are exhausted.

The World provides almost infinite channels to source and vent your outrage. You can consume and generate outrage from the moment you open your eyes till the moment you close them again. 

Like your checking account, your outrage budget is finite and limited. Unlike your checking account, you have no overdraft protection. 

You have principles, things you care deeply about, and people you love. Spending your limited outrage budget defending these is a righteous investment. You’ll never overdraft that budget if you’re the one deciding how to spend it. 

The tribes, however, require your outrage. Your outrage is the energy that allows them to gain power, grow, and keep power — and that’s all they care about. The tribe doesn’t care about your principles, the things you care deeply about, or the people you love. They care about their own power. 

They use emotionally charged terminology such as anti-democratic and anti-free speech to ignite your outrage. Once you’ve lost control of your own outrage budget, overdrafting is all but assured. 

Just make sure that you know who is setting the agenda for your outrage. Is it you, or is it a tribe?

A popular mantra in the personal development world is “Fail Forward.”

Basically, it means to experiment your way to success. With a proper mindset, one can use failure as a tool, like any other tool, and learning how to use it will help you be successful. 

“Ok, I was wrong here. I’ll analyze that to find out why and what I’ll do differently next time.”

Being wrong is also valuable for scientists and engineers. Start with a hypothesis or a design and start experimenting. Modify accordingly through the process — the scientific method in practice. 

“Ah, I see. I was wrong here. Here’s what I’ll change and try again.”

Being wrong is a gift as long as the person a) admits it and b) is willing to change accordingly. 

Can we apply this same theory of being wrong at the institutional, community, and political levels and enjoy the same benefits?

What if, rather than entrenching in either side’s ideological outrage, we admit where we were wrong, admit what we still don’t know, and modify accordingly? 

Doing so will take less outrage, more empathy, and the courage to expose oneself to emotional danger (willing to admit it and willing to change accordingly).

Let’s not waste the gift of being wrong. 

You will piss someone off…

If you put yourself on the hook. 
If you speak up.
If you make a decision.
If you create something.
If you try something that might not work.

It’s not a question of whether you will piss someone off. Someone will always be pissed off. 

The question is who?

One aspect of freedom is that we can choose who it’s for — our voice, our creation, our intention. Sometimes that’s a hard, fuzzy, or implicit decision. 

But you can easily eliminate one entire group: the spectators. It’s never for the spectators. It’s only ever for those in the ring with the bull, like you. 

When you’re struggling with having upset someone, first decide if they’re a spectator or down in the ring with you. 

I’m normally reasonably proud of where I live.

Not right now. Because right now, I live in a clown state.

Here’s what I get: “What is the deal with Oz and Fetterman? And that Mastriano…Is this the best we can do?” And those words are usually accompanied by appropriately astonished or exasperated body language.

Those of us who live here have the same comments and discussions. Each conversation ended with a slight head shake and baffled look.

Both sides, by the way. Reasonable, thinking, caring people from both sides.

How does this happen?

We allow the teams to set the narrative.
The narrative is always good versus evil.
We vote for the team rather than the person.

Where’s the ringmaster? Send in the clowns.

In eastern Pennsylvania, we’re currently in my favorite season.

For about two weeks each year, my lunchtime outdoor workouts are awash in the multitude of autumn colors. The surrounding hills are dominated by yellow but with just enough orange and red to stand out spectacularly. The air is crisp, but the sun is warm.

It’s coming, though.

Soon the hills will be a dreary brown, the air cold and heavy, and the sun will have lost its warming touch.

Winter is coming.

Mercifully, in a few months, the brown gives way to green, the air lightens, and the sun once again warms the skin. The dreary winter is over, and spring has begun.

One of the best things about eastern Pennsylvania is we can count on all four seasons. Although the timing and intensity may vary slightly from year to year, the arc of each is generally the same. Whichever is your favorite, you’ll get enough of it. Whichever is your least favorite, you’ll get enough of that, also.

These seasons are a metaphor for the seasons in our lives. Maybe they’re not as regular, or one outlasts another, but we’re constantly moving through one to another. However, unlike the earth’s seasons, our personal seasons are internal, intimate, and hidden. One cannot look at another and know their season.

The next time the person across the table makes you angry, confused, or hurt, start by trying to understand their season. Do the same when you look in the mirror.