johnmaconline

When you’re the newcomer, you have four options:

• Fit in and embrace
• Fit in and work with the group to change it to something you want it to be
• Don’t fit in and work against the group to change it to something you want it to be
• Leave

Any of those are OK. However, if you choose to not fit in and try to bend the group to what you want, don’t be surprised at the resistance.

Because just as you have the right to try to make it the way you want it, so does everyone else. Especially the ones who set up the rules. Rights go both ways. 

The breeze cools.
The air crisp.
Shadows stretch.
Twighlight encroaches.
Brown dominates.
Grey on its heels.
The wind whistles.
The air cuts.
White blankets.
Night expands.
Orion rises.
Silence deepens.
Everything wet.
The sun warms.
The buds whisper.
Light stretches.
Morning awakens.
Green sprouts.
The sun shouts.
The wind dries.
Roads sizzle.
Shadows shrink.
Evening lingers.
Gold reigns.

Right here, right now.

You know people stuck in the past. You also know people always trying to get somewhere in the future. It roughly maps to age. The older people you know nostalgically romanticize the past. The younger people you know are likely hell-bent on getting somewhere.

Where are you?

In truth, all we have is the present. This moment right now. This moment is where life happens. This morning. This dinner. This walk. This pain. This joy. This grief. This exuberance. This struggle. This relief.

The past and future are fine places, but don’t let this moment pass. There’s no time like the present.

The problem with this slogan isn’t who it represents.

The problem is that it’s a lie. It’s false.

It presumes that at one time, America was great, and now it is no longer. It presumes that someone, or a group of someones, has ruined it. It presumes that your parents, if they lived in America, had it better than you do now.

Do we have problems? Yes. Are we messy right now? Are people exploited, taken advantage of, and otherwise treated as less than? Indeed. Are some things about today’s life in America weird or worse (in your opinion) than they were in the past? Sure. Do we all get along like one big happy family? No.

But the beauty of today’s America is that you can fight for the America you want. You can be who you want. You can talk about the America you want. Because in this country, especially today, your opinion matters, and with social media, you have a platform to voice it. I’ve not been everywhere in this world, but I’ve been a lot of places, and in most of those places, your opinion doesn’t matter. You don’t have opportunity. Your ambitions are meaningless. Your spiritual views and self-identification feelings don’t matter.

So keep fighting. Keep arguing. Keep thinking and feeling about the America you want to live in. Because in this country, you can.

But don’t ever confuse the greatness of the beautiful mess that is today’s America with something that needs to return to the past.

Are you a Burn the Ships person? Or do you have a Plan B?

Unwavering commitment versus hedging your bets.

Plan A is smoke the Turkey. But currently, the smoker is non-functional. I’m waiting on the part, but will it show on time?

Therefore, I have a Plan B. 

I’ve written about, struggled with, and Lord knows thought about the benefits of “Burn the Ships!” But at the end of the day, I’m too much of a pragmatist.

Maybe being a Plan B person holds me back. Maybe I’ve missed out on something amazing. Maybe Plan B destines one for mediocrity.

But also, Apollo 13 aborted Plan A, Starbucks got into the cafe business, Captain Sulley landed on the Hudson, and Operation Dynamo evacuated over 330000 soldiers to safety from Dunkirk. 

The key is to know when to be a Plan B person. 

Your family, like mine, probably has some Thanksgiving traditions with the food you serve. 

Ever wonder where they come from? Do they have roots in the meal celebrated by the Pilgrims and Wampanoag tribe in 1621? Here’s an assessment of some of the traditional foods and the likelihood that they are rooted in historical tradition. 

Turkey (85%)

Wild turkeys were abundant in North America and a common game bird of the time. However, no actual records exist. Venison was almost certainly served. Some families do celebrate with venison.

Cranberry Sauce (60%)

Native Americans used cranberries for many things such as food, medicine, and dye. Plus, they are harvested in November. Maybe they didn’t serve the sauce we know, but there is a reasonable chance they ate cranberries on that day.

Pumpkin Pie (10%)

While the Pilgrims and Wampanoag probably didn’t eat pumpkin pie at the first Thanksgiving, pumpkins were a part of their diet. The tradition of pumpkin pie likely started in the early 18th century when colonists sliced off the pumpkin top, removed the seeds, and filled the insides with milk, spices, and honey, then baked it in hot ashes.

Bread Stuffing (5%)

While stuffing dates back to a cookbook reference from the 4th century during the Roman Empire, there is very little chance that it made its way into the first Thanksgiving meal. It became a Thanksgiving staple as a filling accompaniment to the turkey.

Mashed Potatoes (0%)

Potatoes didn’t make their way to North America until the early 18th century. Mashed potatoes became popular in the U.S. in the 19th century and probably found their way into Thanksgiving meals probably due to a combination of harvesting time, popularity, and the complementary mild taste to the other bolder Thanksgiving staples. 

Green Bean Casserole (0%)

No chance. The green bean casserole, like the white picket fence and “Don’t mess with Texas!”, was dreamed up by a clever marketing person to sell stuff. It was created in 1955 by the Campbell Soup Company to promote their cream of mushroom soup.

Sweet Potatoes/Yams with Marshmallows (0%)

Same story as the green bean casserole. This dish is a result of the marshmallow producers’ attempt to popularize their product in the early 20th century. The addition of marshmallows to sweet potatoes was suggested in a recipe book by Angelus Marshmallows in the 1910s.

So What Did They Eat?

Based on the above, let’s assume that turkey (other wild fowl), venison, cranberries (and other berries), and pumpkins were part of it. The other stuff was likely to be seafood, corn (probably in a porridge form), beans, nuts, and root vegetables. 

Now you know. 

Do you use the furniture that requires the coaster? If so, are the coasters prominently displayed and easy to reach?

Or do you purposefully have furniture that doesn’t require coasters? Or maybe you’re smart about the location of the pieces that do require coasters and the ones that don’t. Or maybe, screw it. We’re not using coasters on any of the furniture.

Of course, there are no right or wrong answers, but congruency matters.

As humans, we often create internal incongruency by saying or doing one thing but (secretly) wishing for something different.

This ain’t about coasters.