johnmaconline

The box exists for a reason. Actually several.

The box keeps the rain out and the heat in. It also keeps the rif-raf out and the people like us in.

The box serves as a guide. Here’s a good direction and a great place to play. But also, stay here, don’t go there.

The box serves up ready-made excuses. The box won’t let me.

The box is familiar. Everything makes sense in the box.

Honestly, there’s probably nothing wrong with the box. Billions of people walk around in the box every day. Happy. Healthy. Safe.

But you and I both know that life begins outside the box.

I do it too. I think we all do, but some are much better at overcoming it than others.

I don’t know if it’s human nature — programmed into us at some basic level. Or if it’s learned — taught by the culture and tribes to which we belong. But I do know it’s a force that is difficult, sometimes impossible, to overcome. 

It’s what keeps people in abusive relationships, crummy jobs, and godforsaken circumstances. Those are the highlight reels. You read about them, see them in news clips, and listen to those stories detailed in podcasts. You probably shake your head and say, “not me.”

But it’s also a much darker and more insidious force that keeps billions of others — probably you and me — on a path of mediocre, malaise, and unrealized dreams. 

That force is the familiar.

We love what we know. We do what we know. We choose what we know. We seek out what others know so we can follow it. We borrow what others know. 

But the path to somewhere is paved with the unfamiliar.

I studied Electrical Engineering in college.

One of the basic electrical components one must learn is called an operation amplifier. Op-amps have a ton of practical circuitry uses in our world such as inverters, phase-shifters, amplifiers, converters, and switches.

To perform circuit analysis and design with op-amps, you can assume that the op-amp is “ideal” — this means you assume several characteristics to be categorically perfect.

Ideal op-amps use no power, have infinite input impedance, unlimited gain-bandwidth and slew rate, no input bias current, and no input offset. They have unlimited voltage compliance.

With these assumptions, you go on your merry way designing or analyzing what’s happening — on paper.

And then you get in the lab. Only practical op-amps exist in the real world, and hence, in the lab.

Practical op-amps consume power, have high, but not infinite, impedance, have limited gain-bandwidth and limited slew rate, have some input bias current and input offset voltage. Voltage compliance is limited by the power supply rail, or frequently even less.

Ideal versus the real world.

Ideal can be assumed for analysis purposes — thought experiments, hypotheses, philosophical systems, “should” statements.

But never forget that, as humans, we live in the real world.

While clearing out my closet recently, I discovered some funky ties from the early 90s — relics from my early-career “work clothes” wardrobe. 

I worked at my first intern assignment at GE AstroSpace during the spring semester of 1990. I wore a tie to the office every day, as did every other male worker.

But apparently, this was already progress because a colleague told me, “not so long ago, we could only wear white shirts and conservative dark ties.”

I returned for my second intern assignment during the spring semester of 1991. Casual Fridays emerged, signaling the onset of Business Casual. No more ties on these days. 

After graduating, I began full-time at the same office, with the same team, and the same people in the early summer of 1992. I never wore a tie to work again. And by now, casual Friday attire had morphed into jeans and a respectable shirt. 

By the time I left that job (by then, the company had morphed into Lockheed Martin) in 1995, jeans and respectable shirts had weaseled into the entire week unless you were presenting to management or meeting with customers. 

And now look at us. Who has “work clothes”? What even is Business Casual? 

Sometimes tradition guides us as to the (relatively) “right thing to do.” Sometimes we mistake tradition for the “right thing to do.” 

There’s nothing wrong with tradition. But let’s recognize the difference between tradition and “the right thing to do.”

I’ve always been a destination man.

I never understood wandering. I need a destination.
I never understood no plan. I need a destination.
I never understood those who walk slowly. I gotta get there.
I never understood those who drive slowly. I gotta get there.

One thing that age has taught me:

There is no destination. And why are you in such a hurry to get nowhere?

I’m getting better at taking in the journey, but I have a ways to go.

Start here. End there.
Movement. Everywhere.
Force required.
Stuck and tired.
Faced with fear.
Not very clear.
Do it anyway,
or maybe someday you’ll find
the end you didn’t intend.
Twist and turn,
In lessons learned.
Choices matter,
Amidst the chatter.
The journey, long,
Requires a song.
Start with a stride,
There’s no place to hide.
Forge your path,
Defy the wrath.
Till the end you’ll see,
The person you’re meant to be.

Continuing the conversation with my younger self…

Current Self: Hey, I got some good news and some bad news to share with you. Which do you want first?

Younger Self: I guess the bad.

Current Self: You won’t get picked. Nobody is gonna choose you.

Younger Self: Huh? What do you mean? Chosen for what?

Current Self: Nobody is gonna walk up to you and just hand you opportunities or a job or the perfect life. Nobody will notice you. Ever.

Younger Self: I don’t think I understand.

Current Self: You know how you’re waiting for things to happen? You assume that if you do the right things — get the degree, stay within the framework, try the front door — that this will get you noticed. Someone will notice your talent and hand you the perfect job or some amazing opportunity.

Younger Self: OK, but isn’t that how The World works? Fit in, play by the rules, and get good enough to be chosen?

Current Self: That’s what I’m trying to say. It doesn’t. At least not for you. 

Younger Self: That just sounds like bad news. So, what’s the good news?

Current Self: The good news is that you can choose yourself. You don’t have to wait for someone else to pick you. You can create your own opportunities, your own success, your own life. 

Younger Self: That sounds selfish. I don’t want to be that guy.

Current Self: I’m not talking about narcissism. This isn’t about looking out only for yourself or caring only about yourself, or doing the things that put you ahead at all costs. In fact, it’s kind of the opposite. 

Younger Self: How so?

Current Self: It’s simply about recognizing your potential, taking responsibility for your life, and using it to make a positive impact on those around you. It’s about not waiting for others to define your value or to give you permission to be great.

Younger Self: So how do I choose myself?

Current Self:  Invest in yourself — physically, emotionally, intellectually, and spiritually. Embrace fear and failure. Create things. Get comfortable with uncertainty. Be open to and seek out opportunities. Talk to people — all kinds of people. Help others. Help your community. Lean into faith. Stand up for what and who you believe in, but always seek to walk in others’ shoes. Listen don’t shout. Lead with empathy. 

Younger Self: Hmmm. Sounds empowering, but how am I supposed to do all that?

Current Self: That’s for you to figure out. It’s a tall order, but if you manage it, everything changes. You don’t have to be perfect. You just have to keep moving forward. 

Current Self: Hey, one more thing about fear.

Younger Self: OK, what is it?

Current Self: Don’t think it goes away just because you’re walking towards it. It doesn’t.

Younger Self: So you’re saying that I’m supposed to go towards my fears, but that when I do, it doesn’t get any easier?

Current Self: Not exactly. It will get easier. What I mean is the more you face it, the better you’ll get at handling it. It won’t go away, but your confidence will soar. And confidence is everything. 

Younger Self: I think I understand. Are you saying that even though the fear doesn’t subside, I’ll start to build up a skillset at dealing with it?

Current Self: Bingo! Because your goal isn’t to have no fear but to have the confidence that you’ll succeed in the face of fear. Everyone is afraid of something. What separates the successful from the unsuccessful is the ability to operate within that fear — to feel that fear deeply and still move forward.

Younger Self: So, take my fear of heights. You’re saying that I’ll never get over it, but I shouldn’t let it keep me from doing things?

Current Self: Yes! If you shy away, you’ll miss out on a bunch of memories that you wouldn’t otherwise have had, plus it will help you get better at operating when afraid. So stand on the edge of that cliff and feel your knees go weak.

Younger Self: OK, got it. The fear doesn’t go away. But do it anyway. 

Continuing my conversation with my younger self…

Current Self: Hey, let’s talk about fear, because you’re going to experience a lot of it. 

Younger Self: Ok, sure.

Current Self: Fear isn’t your enemy. It’s your compass — your guide. You’re gonna want to walk towards it. 

Younger Self: My compass? That doesn’t make sense. Fear means danger. Why would I go towards it?

Current Self: Danger, sometimes. But its mostly just emotional danger. 

Younger Self: I don’t know. Isn’t safety what we ultimately want?

Current Self: Well, let’s look at. When’s the last time something amazing happened when you weren’t a little afraid? 

Younger Self: Hmmmm

Current Self: Now, what happened when you were a little afraid? Like when you talked to the girl, or gave the presentation, or jumped off the 10-meter platform? 

Younger Self: OK, good stuff. But there were times when fear led to failure, too.

Current Self: And those failures? They were the sparks that fueled your fire. Every fall was a stepping stone, each failure a lesson. Fear will lie, but you must hear the truth in its whisper. That truth? That you are limitless.

Younger Self: I never thought of it that way.

Current Self: Start thinking of fear as a challenge, a riddle to solve. Go towards it, embrace it, wrestle with it. It’s a wild ride, and it’s where life truly begins.

Younger Self: It’s still scary, though.

Current Self: That means you’re on the right track. 

Continuing the conversation with my younger self…

Current Self: I need to tell you about another myth of The World. You’ve got to stop playing by their rules. 

Younger Self: But isn’t that what we’re supposed to do? Follow the rules, work hard, and then it’ll all fall into place? 

Current Self: How’s that working out for you so far?

Younger Self:  You’re telling me to just ignore everything I’ve been taught? Just go rogue?

Current Self: No, it’s not about going rogue. It’s about creating your own path. Creating doors that don’t yet exist. 

Younger Self: So, you’re saying we should just break the rules?

Current Self: Not break them, reframe them. Playing it safe will suffocate your potential. There’s a third door to success, one you forge yourself.

Younger Self: But what will others think? Won’t they hate me or think I’m not playing fair?

Current Self: Some will, problaby, but forget them. They’re the front-door people, stuck in their lanes. But some will get it.

Younger Self: But what if I fail? What if I make a fool of myself?

Current Self: What if you do? You’ll learn, and you’ll move on. You’ll get better. Failure isn’t the end; it’s a new beginning. And that beginning is forged along your own path. 

The real fools are those who never try.